Hebrew? More like BETRAYBREW!

So I went to my second SuperHardHebrew class on Tuesday and everything was SO GREAT. I remembered EVERY SINGLE WORD I studied this past week and some words I DIDN'T EVEN STUDY and my two fellow students were looking at me the whole time with shining, impressed eyes and my Hebrew teacher didn't look at me like I was the biggest JewIdiot that had ever lived.

No, that's not what happened, this is what happened. The opposite of all that. Imagine everything that is opposite. It was all that.

This is the Problem of the Week with learning Hebrew. I make flashcards to learn vocab but as it turns out I've been memorizing the FLASHCARDS not the words. Like, in my limited number of flashcards I know the approximate combination of sounds for each word, so when that approximate combination of sounds comes up, I'm like "Oh, totally, "carpet", I've got this." But then when "carpet" is surrounded by a bunch of Hebrew words I don't know, I become the dictionary definition of "flummoxed" and "befuddled" because I've basically been cheating myself by memorizing the vocabulary in relation to the OTHER FLASHCARDS not in relation to the HEBREW LANGUAGE THAT ISRAELI PEOPLE SPEAK.

My brain, without me knowing it, basically found a really complicated way of cheating. Nice going, brain, I knew you could do it.

Here's a recap in pictures.

"Oh, Flashcards, I love you SOOOO much, I know you would NEVER betray me."

"HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME! I THOUGHT WHEN I WAS MEMORIZING YOU I WAS ACTUALLY LEARNING HEBREW!"

(Despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair, despair)

"Now I know what I must do...."

"MURDER YOU ALL MOST VICIOUSLY!"

So even thought I'm by far and away the worst person in my Hebrew class (Two people transferred one level up so now we're down to three people, being the worst out of three people is no great shame, to semi-quote "Fiddler on the Roof", which I plan to semi-quote at least eight hundred more times over the course of this blog) even though I'm the worst person in the class, the fact is that I'm able to construct sentences in Hebrew, tiny, baby, two-year-old grammatically-not-correct sentences, BUT they are sentences, and that's something I couldn't do two weeks ago.

Even if progress is teeny-tiny-super-eensy-small, it's still progress, and that deserves an exclamation mark!

Plus, here's all the Hebrewcabulary that I learned this week. With commentary!

Heebie Words I Didn't Know Last Week That I Now Know This Week:

Bag, Library, Village, Economics, Now (which is easy to remember because it's ach-shan, so I always remember it like "ACTION!" which is a word that could be used if a director wanted to start filming a scene "NOW!"), newspaper, letter (Meek-tav, which I remember because it sounds like "missive"), Papers, homework ( ahvohdaht bayeet, literally translates as "papers for in the house"), book, on, about, e-mail (this is adorable, it's Do-ehr Electronee, which means "Electronic Post Office", and also I think "Electronee" is such a cuter word than electronic, I'm going to start using it in my daily life because people that slip foreign phrases into casual conversation aren't annoying and obnoxious at all) man, woman, people, why, because,good, new, old, big, small, pretty, interesting, nice, red, blue, white, black, green, yellow, city, place, room, goodbye, there is/are, there is/are not, shopping mall(Kanyon, I remember this like "There's a CANYON of clothes I can't afford to buy right now in the shopping mall!), tired, popsicle, quiet, want, buy, drink, see/watch, party, birthday, gift, things, money, still, maybe, first, how, world, street, floor, soldier, apartment,bed, chair, flower pot, dresser, shelf, table, sofa, carpet, closet, fridge, toilet, shower, AND MOST IMPORTANTLYdiaspora, synagogue and Judaism

Next Post: Something, I don't know yet.